Why YOUR EX does NOT want you after NO CONTACT (2024)

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Why YOUR ex does not want you after no contact

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Let's go on our YouTube Welcome Back to the channel I'm coach black, your internet relationship and breakup coach.

Before we go any further I want to take a second to say.

Thank you for being here.

And for tuning in to another video, you could have been doing anything.

You literally could have been doing anything.

But you chose to spend a few moments with me and I.

Appreciate it.

Welcome to my home I'm happy to have you here, today's topic.

Why your ex does not want you.

If you think about that question from the surface, you might have a ton of answers because your ex likely gave you reasons for the breakup.

And if you did what most people tend to do you called and you begged and you chased they likely even gave you more and more reasons like it's, not you it's me and I have to work on myself or I'm, going through so much in my life right now.

I just cannot focus on a relationship.

How do I know your ex has this because I talk to people like you every single day and it's the strangest thing, but X is always seem to have the same reasons for breakups I think, it's because they know there's certain things that if they say you can't really argue with there's, nothing, you can do about someone who feels like they need to work on themselves.

The reality is if your ex, truly truly cared.

They would work on themselves with you.

So do not focus on all of the reasons that your ex told you I'm gonna give you the secret right here in this video, why your ex does not want you.

But before we go any further I'd ask that you like this video, right now, if you're enjoying the content, it really does help the channel and it's, the least that you can do and I, truly do appreciate it it pushes out this video to other people that need the help.

And that have questions about breakups also, subscribe subscribe to the channel right now.

So you don't, miss any of my future videos.

And my lives I go lives here on YouTube, Tuesdays and Thursdays at 9 30, p.m Central.

So that's, another way for you to get additional value, but let's hop back into the video.

Why your ex does not want.

You it's, pretty simple, but I'm going to explain it using an analogy that I heard from another YouTube channel that channel is called psych hacks.

It's, actually, a really really good psychology.

Channel I, don't know, the guy's name, but it's, a really good channel.

So you should check it out I'll, leave the link in description below.

But anyway, he was talking about exchange of value as I've said, time and time again, relationships are in exchange of value.

And in life life is about exchanging like you have one thing you exchange it with another person.

And this is what actually forms a relationship.

So if you think about your job, you have a service that you provide to your employer and they pay you a salary for a relationship to happen.

There must be an exchange.

There must be an exchange right? But I want to take this a step deeper.

So one of the examples that, um, this guy gave in the video psych hacks was, um.

If you think about relationships and exchanging right it's, not about exchanging two equal items, because that will never make sense.

So think about it like this.

If I approached you with the dollar bill and I said, hey, I have a dollar bill.

And you also had a dollar bill and I said, hey, let's exchange.

You give me your dollar and I give you my dollar that would make no sense.

And you would be like why what's what's so special about my dollar, at least if I wasn't asking you to break it into quarters, or something that would make sense for the exchange to take place because it's the same item.

And so he argues that when an exchange happens, it's never an equal exchange.

There have to be some perceived value difference.

Each person has to feel like they are getting something greater than what they're giving or something that is more valuable to them here's.

Another example that he gave that I love when you go to a coffee shop.

And you go buy coffee.

You give them money, and they give you coffee, right, it's, not because all these things are identical it's because to you who has the money in that moment, you have more money than you have coffee and coffee is really important to you at that time.

So you want to make the exchange and to whoever owns the store.

They have a ton of coffee, but less money.

They want the money in exchange for all this coffee that they have.

Now, how does this apply to your ex understand that for your ex to love you to want to be with you to want to get into this exchange of value and enter a relationship with you? They have to feel like they are getting something of greater value than they are offering.

So this is why when you're begging and chasing and trying to force your ex to be with you and you're apologizing, you're, portraying yourself of lesser and lesser and lesser value.

Because the truth is, if you were truly high value, you would have a lot of options.

You would have no need to beg and chase people who do not want you all right.

So take a second to think about it.

Every time you're about to send that extra text when your ex hasn't, even responded to the last 20., you're reinforcing, the mindset in their mind that if they get with you, they are getting something of lesser value.

So why would they want to enter into this exchange? This is why I say silence and mystery is the best policy you have to act like you have a better opportunity out there in the future.

And even if you don't right now, that's, how you have to act that's, how you have to believe and continue to work towards making yourself better and making your life better.

These are the only terms that your ex will come back.

When they believe that being with, you is the best option for them.

And quite frankly, when they see you as a greater prize than themselves, do not chase them do not beg them focus on yourself.

What can you improve about your life today that will improve your position? And the better, you become the more attractive you will be to your ex, and they will be the ones chasing you it's, very simple.

So don't, focus on your ex focus on yourself, and you will naturally attract them back to you.


I hope, this is helpful, I hope, you really enjoyed the video.

And if you did, you can go ahead and leave a like right now and comment down below.

And let me know what you think let me know what your thoughts are.

Let me know what you're dealing with and I'll be sure to respond to as many comments as I.

Can if you would like to talk to me one-on-one, the quickest way to do so is to click the first link in description, and we can talk about your situation and what you're dealing with truly an honor to talk to each.

And every one of you I'm blessed, I, love it.

And so I'm looking forward to talking to you either in the comments or on a one-on-one coaching call.

Anyway, I'll catch you in the next video.


Why YOUR EX does NOT want you after NO CONTACT (2024)


Why is my ex ignoring me after no contact? ›

Maybe they moved on and want nothing to do with you anymore. Maybe they're doing the whole no-contact thing. Maybe they're pissed off. Your ex could also just be protecting themselves from any unwanted emotions — perhaps they fear that if they respond, they'll re-open their breakup wounds.

Why wont my ex move on? ›

There are many reasons why people hurt themselves this way. They might feel they have no other place to go. Or they feel they will never find someone so right for them again. Perhaps they choose partners who can never love them the same way in return, and yet can't accept that finality.

Does no contact make your ex think about you? ›

It is most likely that your ex still cares about you and thinks about you during no contact. That does notmean you should reach out to them. You should not. If you've just been broken up with, read “What Do I Do If I Was Just Dumped?” for a detailed explanation of why this is the case and why it should encourage you.

Why would an ex avoid you? ›

If your ex is ignoring you, it could be because they're just trying not to give away mixed signals or bring up things from the breakup that are better left unsaid. Or they could also be sensitive to anything that you might bring up yourself and may be protecting themselves from any more hurt feelings.

How do you know if he won't come back? ›

He doesn't want to hang out

This is a normal desire and if the breakup was for the most part mutual, it can be healthy, too. But if he never wants to hang out with you, it's a good sign he's not coming back. If he doesn't want to spend any time with you, his interests likely lie elsewhere and he's moving on from you.

How do you let someone go who doesn't want you? ›

How to let go of someone
  1. Recognize when it's time. Learning when it's time to let go is often the most difficult part of this process. ...
  2. Identify limiting beliefs. ...
  3. Change your story. ...
  4. Stop the blame game. ...
  5. Embrace the “F” word. ...
  6. Master your emotions. ...
  7. Practice empathy. ...
  8. Adopt an attitude of gratitude.

How do you know if your ex doesn't want you? ›

How to Recognize When Your Ex Won't Come Back, and How to Move On
  • 1 They found someone else.
  • 2 They're enjoying their life.
  • 3 They're reinventing themselves.
  • 4 They don't want to be friends.
  • 5 They block you.
  • 6 They deleted all your photos together.
  • 7 They physically avoid you.
  • 8 They act cold toward you.

How do you move on from an ex who doesn't want you? ›

How to Move On from an Ex
  1. Cut contact. Yes, I know you know it, but it's THE most important step. ...
  2. Don't fool yourself. ...
  3. It happened for a reason. ...
  4. Celebrate your time. ...
  5. Time for self-love. ...
  6. Express your feelings. ...
  7. Stay close to your friends and family.

Does no contact make someone want you? ›

The no-contact rule will not help you get your ex back

Some people try to use the no-contact rule as a form of manipulation (i.e., a way to get your ex to miss you so much, they want you back). But despite what some people will tell you on the internet, no contact is not particularly effective for getting an ex back.

How do you know if your ex misses you spiritually? ›

If your ex is trying to communicate with you, it is one of the spiritual signs your ex misses you and craves your presence. They want to hear your voice or ask how you have been doing. Chances are that deep down they regret being away from you and want to come back to you.

Does my ex still think of me? ›

It is possible that your ex is still thinking about you from time to time, even if you no longer have contact. If you were together for a long time, or if the relationship took place during an important part of your life, separating the memories of an ex from the general memories can be difficult.

What does it mean when your ex ignores your messages? ›

It's also possible they need more time to decide whether they want you in their life. If you don't hear back, it could mean they've decided that going “no contact” — which typically lasts for about 30 days — is the best way to move on.

Do dumpers miss their ex during no contact? ›

For some the “missing emotion” can be fleeting. For others, all consuming. In all though, yes, there's a high likelihood that the dumper will miss the ex at some point.

How do you know if your ex feels guilty? ›

It can often be identified within exes by these five signs,
  1. Diagnose The Three Reasons People Tend To Feel Guilty.
  2. Their Social Media Behavior Changes Dramatically.
  3. Being Abnormally Quick To Anger.
  4. Your Ex Becomes Very Moody.
  5. Your Ex Becomes Very Avoidant.
Jun 9, 2021

Why is my ex ignoring me but not blocking me? ›

It simply means your ex needs a little break. If your ex has not blocked you yet, there is a pretty much chance they will do it as soon as you will try to contact them. Most people block each other after a breakup because they don't want to stay connected any more.

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