My Ex Wants To Stay Friends: Good Or Bad Idea When Still In Love After A Breakup (2023)

FAQs

Is it healthy to stay friends with an ex you still love? ›

A friendship with an ex can be highly rewarding, but it's more than OK not to have a relationship or be in contact with them. Accepting the transience of connection and moving forward on your own path will give you much more peace than holding onto a past flame when there is no longer alignment.

Your ex might want to be friends if they're trying not to hurt your feelings or they want the breakup to be amicable. They might also want to be friends if they want to get back together with you or hook up with you.

There are four main reasons, Rebecca Griffith and her colleagues found, why exes feel compelled to maintain a friendship or to suggest doing so: for civility (i.e., I want this breakup to hurt less than it will otherwise), for reasons relating to unresolved romantic desires (I want to see other people but keep you ...

According to the research, staying friends with an ex for security and practicality is more likely to have positive outcomes. When you've known someone intimately, you trust them and rely on them for emotional support and help.

Heartbreak isn't limited to just romantic relationships, nor is it any less valid if the heartbreak comes from a platonic source. Yes, our friends can break our hearts—we tend to trust our friends with our vulnerabilities, and when they walk away it leaves a hole in our heart where they used to be.

They're friends with their ex

Feeling threatened by an ex is a normal feeling — but it's not a red flag. Maybe they were friends before they started dating. Perhaps they value each other's opinions or words of advice. Or maybe they dated so long ago that every ounce of romantic connection has simply disappeared.

Staying friends with someone after developing real romantic feelings for them can be hard. However, many people have successfully remained friends after unrequited love confessions. Although it's common for two people not to be able to get past potential awkwardness, it can still be possible for some.

Final thoughts. Being friends with an ex can work for some people. If both ex-partners want a platonic friendship, can impose sensible boundaries, and are willing to wait for emotional healing to take place, it's possible to remain friends with an ex.

A new survey has found that the majority of respondents (69%) have stayed friends with their ex after a breakup. Those aged between 45 and 54 were the most likely age group to keep their ex close, with three-quarters (74%) admitting that they had at least attempted to stay friends with an ex following a breakup.

Is my ex keeping me as an option? ›

You can tell a lot about your ex just by looking at their phone messages or texts — if they even bother to reply to your messages at all. If your ex doesn't even bother to text or call you back anymore, then that's a very good sign that they are using you as a backburner option.

Most definitely, yes! Especially if your ex wants to be friends even after you have told them that you don't want to. If they keep messaging you on your social media, block them right away. That way they will not be able to contact you in any way whatsoever and will not be able to keep tabs on your life.

What does it mean when your ex wants to be friends? It may mean they are not over the relationship yet or regret the decision to break up with you. They may also want to be friends because they want to be on good terms with you post-breakup or may need something from you.

A recent study showed that 44% of Americans have gotten back together with one of their exes after breaking up with them. However, of these couples, it's less clear whether they were able to build and stay in healthy, loving relationships in the long run.

It's unlikely that an ex will forget about you, even if you don't communicate with them after the breakup. Relationships tend to make an large emotional impact on both people involved, so it's likely your ex will remember you and the relationship even after the breakup.

It is possible to find love after heartbreak, to find joy with another if you give yourself time to reflect on what happened and to resolve your feelings about the past before moving on.

"Being platonic friends with an ex (after a bit of cooling off time) is completely fine, as long as you respect boundaries, don't force your partner to hang out with your ex and let everyone know there's no chance of reconciliation," says online dating expert Julie Spira.

Under no circumstances should a relationship that was abusive, manipulative or toxic transition into a friendship, Sussman says. But even if your relationship was generally healthy and simply didn't work out, you might want to think twice before becoming pals.

If you share a healthy bond and have firm boundaries with your ex, being in touch with them can become a significant part of your social support, since the relationship has a certain level of shared comfort. The key is to know what your expectations and boundaries are with each other.

Can you stay friends after a relationship? ›

Breaking up doesn't always mean you don't have a chance at a friendship. If you are both on the same page and agree, you can remain friends after breaking up. If you need help deciding what is right for you, you might consider getting a professional opinion.

If you want to get an ex back who lost feelings for you, you'll have to make sure you're the first type of person for them. Be the kind of person they would gravitate to. This means being pleasant to be around. Be positive, make jokes, smile and spread love around you.

The short answer is, being FWB with an ex is possible, but it isn't easy. "If you have a history with a person, while that may make it easier to get into bed the first time, that history will follow you into the bedroom at some point over time," Joshua Klapow, Ph.

When looking at the timeline of breakups, many sites refer to a “study” that's actually a consumer poll a market research company conducted on behalf of Yelp. The poll's results suggest it takes an average of about 3.5 months to heal, while recovering after divorce might take closer to 1.5 years, if not longer.

The average American adult has been through three major relationship break-ups and spent more than a year and a half of their lives getting over them, new research reveals.

First, you can say: “I understand that we were together for a while and it is hard to be apart. Right now, being friends with you is not something I'm ready or able to do. I will reach out to you in the future if anything changes.” Another option is to be a little bit more gentle.

Grieving and Checking Up On Your Ex

It's normal to grieve the loss of an important relationship. However, it can be detrimental, while you're grieving, to check up on your ex because it can bring back all the negative emotions tied to the relationship and why it ended in the first place.

What is a limbo relationship? ›

'Relationship Limbo' is a mental and/or physical place where there's no progression in your relationship. Living apart for a long time isn't healthy for a relationship (unless you've both agreed it's what you want). You should both share a common goal for the future.

The psychology of blocking someone can evoke indignation and a sense of rejection, reminiscent of the social dynamics of high school. Blocking someone sends a clear message, but it's a cowardly move to run away and hide behind our devices.

What does it mean when an ex wants to catch up? If your ex wants to meet up to “catch up,” it's likely that they have felt an emptiness in their life since the break-up and simply wants to meet up to see you, talk with you, be with you.

What's the most common reason narcissists want to be friends? They know you're still longing for them. Narcissists thrive on being the center of attention. If they know you'll keep coming back, they have no incentive to change their behavior.

Unrequited love occurs when one person yearns for unconditional love from another individual who doesn't feel the same way. This type of love appears more prevalently in people with anxious attachment styles and low defensiveness.

Staying silent can also help you feel empowered. You're taking charge and showing your ex that you're capable of and willing to live life without them. Whether you're the one who was hurt or the one who ended it, cutting off communication after a breakup puts you in control.

How many exes get back together. According to much research, about 40 to 50 percent of couples get back together after a breakup. While this is positive, many factors determine the chances of getting back together after a breakup.

Key points. Research finds that 40-50 percent of people have reunited with an ex to start a new relationship. On-again relationships tend to suffer lower relationship quality and worse functioning than never-broken relationships. People often resume relationships with ex-partners because of lingering feelings.

Is it true that you can be friends with your ex? ›

There's a difference between being friends and being friendly. It's OK to stay in touch with an ex without having to force a friendship if it doesn't serve you. While it may be possible to be friends with an ex, whether it's a good idea or not will depend on the situation and the people involved.

Ideally, you would wait six to 12 months after a breakup before even asking yourself that question. And if there ever was any abuse in the relationship, don't ask it at all — focus on getting distance and moving on. After any breakup, you want to ensure that you put your well-being first.

It's something that you should smile about and take encouragement from if you are wanting to get back together with them. However, it is still important that you politely reject friendship. Don't be cold or mean, but express your lack of interest in being friends and go straight into no contact.

Although it is normal to bring up one's ex, frequently mentioning them may be a sign of lingering feelings. If your partner seems to be constantly mentioning their ex, it is likely that they are still on their mind. Even if they are badmouthing their ex, too much talk can indicate that they have not moved on.